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Free solo climbing, also known as free soloing, is a form of free climbing where the climber (the free soloist) forgoes ropes, harnesses and other protective gear while ascending and relies only on his or her physical strength, climbing ability, and psychological fortitude to avoid a fatal fall. Free solo climbing should not be confused with general free climbing, in which gear is typically used for safety in case of a fall, but not to assist the climb.

Last summer I became a free soloist, A personal challange that has only one know outcome,..LIVING  This free solo climbing has given me a focus and determination to live because the only alternative is death.

It all started when I shaved my head, native custom is that by shaving the head all the pain and anguish attached to it is removed from the body.

This has been an incredibly trying month.  On top of everything I have been writing about I have literally been starving to death.  In life there are times you simply have to push life to the absolute threshold.  My phone got shut off so I have been living completely isolated.  I go home at night listen to my little short wave radio and think, the silence has been deafening.  On top of all this I have literally sold everything I own just to keep my marina from taking my boat.  I sold my windless, my beloved ukulele, all my backpacking gear, clothes, everything including my little point and shoot which is my life’s blood, yet I’m still down two months on slip rent.

I’m not one to sit around feeling sorry for myself but I have literally been trapped.  I cant stay, I cant leave.  I cant work on the boat because I forgot to buy brushes and tape the last time I splurged on boat materials.  So I have just been in survival mode every day.  feeling very thankful for all I have in life.  Life is a series of tests, we can pass or fail.  So far I have been fortunate to pass every one and with it one more lesson has been learned and I feel a bit wiser.

This week everything has started to change.  I have a small boat in contract and while this will be the first ever when it closes, there is a first time for everything.  I have been a yacht broker on and off for most of my life.  I have never closed a deal when an offer has been made sight unseen.  Well this will be my first.  When the buyer arrives Monday all the marine surveys will be done the boat will be on a trailer and ready to go.  All the buyer has to do is say yes, the funds will be in title and I have a notary standing by.  By this time next week I will have a whopping $1000.00 commission in my hand which will bring me up to $2000.00 year to date.  I will only get to keep $100.00 of it but it might as well be a million dollars.  It gets better, when I did my deep cleaning I found a few bucks in change, a box with three hand rolled cigarettes and a bottle of Staggs Leap Private Reserve.  Tonight I will drink that bottle smoke my ciggis and quit smoking forever.  Wait it keeps getting better.  I came into the office today and there was an email from my cell phone company telling me that I am a valued customer and that they gave me a full month of free service :).  Are you kidding me??? wait there is more, there was a message on my phone, it was a girl from Alaska wanting to buy a boat. I seriously must be the most fortunate person on the entire world.  When it rains it pours.

Self portrait, 100′ off the deck.  Life is good, living it is better 🙂

Happiness cannot be traveled to, owned, earned, worn or consumed. Happiness is the spiritual experience of living every minute with love, grace, and gratitude.

~Denis Waitley